These days, most guys are forgetting about outer game, which I think is such a shame because it is such an important factor. So important, that I cannot see how anyone can get laid without taking it into consideration.
In fact, if someone is talking about seduction without talking about the actual seduction itself – as it is in real life, then I doubt this person actually gets laid at all.
There are no doubts that inner game and outer game are both important factors in order to become a good seducer. Some find outer game being more crucial, without eliminating the importance of inner game and some are aiming for the opposite direction.
More or less, this has been debated to death.
What I am trying to say is that both are very important.
Inner game is the pillar and will be reflected in your outer game. Outer game on the other side is “your way of doing it”, the way you communicate who you are, your inner game – as mostly everything in this seduction is about conveying your attractive personality traits. (So we have inner = psychological and outer = phsyical)
It doesn’t really matter that much if you have great beliefs, a lot of confidence or the proper mindsets if you fail to communicate that you have them.
Sure, many would say that what you think and feel will be reflected in your actions and I agree with this.
However it would be way less efficient to communicate your thoughts, beliefs, personality and how you feel about yourself than that way.
You really need a Taylor suited and specific way of doing so – which is where outer game comes in.
Most good seducers and PUAs have rock-solid outer game and I can’t think of even one seducer who hasn’t been concerned about outer game.
They do focus on mindsets and stuff as well, but they are also concerned about how they present themselves.
Lots of PUA’s these days are only focusing on mindsets and stuff, but I find this misleading, very misleading. Having well-thought techniques and rock-solid ways of communicating them is what makes you really good.
I am not here to talk about getting a few lays and maybe a girlfriend. I am here to talk about getting laid as often and as efficiently as possible. Just being an attractive male – with the proper spirit (inner game) is not interesting to me.
Inner game is all about developing your “spirit”, your very being. Instead of just focusing on inner game, you should be working on CONVEYING your inner “spirit”.
In fact, being an attractive male is rather pointless unless you are able communicate it PROPERLY to others.
Each interaction differs and the vibe between you and a girl will change relatively to her mood, the location and the phase of the seduction.
Women might also differ in how things need to be communicated to them. Therefore outer game can be extremely useful as you can figure out the best way that fits the situation to communicate your intent.
There cannot be any words concerning calibration without considering outer game.
Being attractive – as being confident, dominant, knowing what you want – having standards, having the proper beliefs about women (such as “women love sex”) are indeed attractive, but it can’t always be communicated by simply being that type of man.
Most experienced players would agree that seduction is a process. You have to lead women toward different steps and escalate the vibe. It requires a certain skill set- a skill set that allows you to make things happen.
Having a good inner game would not have been enough for doing so because there are few things that need to be practically handled – there is a system.
You need to know what the next step is and how you can lead her there properly. This requires PRACTICAL knowledge which outer game is all about.
Feeling confident and having nice beliefs will not be enough to get laid – you need to make it happen – and that requires that you know how to do it.
You need to influence her, you need to lead her state, you need to challenge her beliefs – this is because you are a man and has to be the one in charge and lead the interaction forward, in other words you are the one that needs to make things happen.
Inner game is about fixing oneself and can indirectly influence the third party (the chick you are interacting with) – having the proper beliefs about sex, being confident about yourself and your sexuality and so on might affect the girl, but not directly and not efficiently enough.
Keep in mind that most women do not share the same beliefs as you do, nor have the same amount of confidence or the same mindsets, in fact most women are rather mentally weak (like most average men) when it comes to sex. Which means that she might have negative beliefs or feelings around/about sex.
This needs to be handled. In fact most women have Anti-Slut-Defence. If you don’t know how to fix it, you will get nowhere and at this point, being confident and only having the proper mental baggage such knowing that women loves sex would give you a rather weak standing.
It is also a well-known fact that women have the mindset that sex needs to be a hard thing for us men to get. They on purpose make it hard for us as they often put out a lot of resistance.
In fact, this is a huge element that can’t be left out. You need to understand why she is behaving the way she is (which goes under the category of inner game as “understanding”), but you also need know how to handle it – which is a practical thing.
This can be a tricky thing and needs practical techniques in order to handle it. Here again outer game seems to be of great importance.
However, many have negative opinions of outer game, because they perceive it is rather anti-social and robotic. Let me tell you that this is a false belief. Most guys who have been out with me would say that my delivery will is very fluid and natural.
I can see that many would consider routines as lame because it is too canned and doesn’t give a lot of flexibility – as you will be stuck within their boundaries.
But you need to know how to make things happen and how to handle the different objections, obstacles and forms of resistance that might occur.
In order to do this, we will not need any routines but simply some techniques that will allow us to communicate our intent with the purpose of having certain influence over her, resulting in a desired outcome. These techniques need to be flexible in a way allowing us to calibrate according to the situation – like a blueprint instead of a plan.
Until Next Time,
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