If you’re like most guys, you probably get nervous around attractive women and you suck at approaching.
Approaching girls is really the first step in seduction.
If you’re brand new to pick up, it’s time to quit reading about advanced escalation techniques and B.S. routines and instead focus on the approach.
You can’t escalate or build attraction without a successful approach. Like with learning anything in life, it’s all about baby steps.
Learn to approach, get out there and do it, then come back and learn the next step. If you suffer from approach anxiety then its essential that you get out there and start approaching women and get over your fear of rejection.
How To Approach Girls
Good Approach Example:
- You see a girl (force an indicator of interest i.e. a smike or go in cold)
- You open with a direct statement (I just saw you from over there and thought you looked interesting so I wanted to meet you) or indirect (who lies more men or women – LOL) based on the situation and with strong eye contact.
- She responds very positively for the first 30 seconds.
- You keep the conversation going, introduce very light kino (touching of arms/hands), build some rapport and develop a strong connection.
- You instant date her or number close.
Bad Approach Example:
- You open with bad body language and struggle with your words.
- You make little or too intense eye contact… so she takes a step back, thinks you’re a weirdo, makes an excuse to leave or simply ignores you completely.
- Your confidence takes a hit and you leave paralyzed with fear.
Ok, so it’s pretty obvious how a good and bad approach works. Being great at approaching means being able to come up with things on the spot to say.
Being able to come up with witty things on the spot is like a mental muscle. The more you exercise it, the stronger it gets. That’s why natural PUAs don’t need B.S. lines or routines; they create effective lines on the spot without even thinking about it.
If you’re not quite a natural yet, you need to come up with an opener. One of the three:
- An indirect opener – You can approach a girl and ask her for the time or if she knows where a coffee shop is, ask for any land mark close by (girls will often show you if its just around the corner). Most women prefer an indirect approach because they can’t deal with the sexual tension/awkwardness of a direct approach. But if you can pull off a direct approach its the fastest way to pickup a girl.
- A direct opener – A direct opener is being direct and letting the girl know your intentions upfront. For example saying “excuse me, I just saw you from over there and I had to come over and say something because you’re very cutre” or “Hi, I just saw you from over there and thought you looked interesting, so I had to come over and meet you”.
- A forced IOI – This is the best kind of opener in a bar or club. You force an indicator of interest, which is usually a smile or laugh. Simply make eye contact with a girl from a distance and make her laugh or smile. Then proceed to go over and open her, she’ll have a positive reaction because of the forced IOI.#
Lastly, it’s all about being authoritative and confident. The best way to be authoritative and confident is to maintain strong eye contact and body language. Never break sexual tension by cracking a joke or making a stupid face.